Saturday, June 6, 2020
Surviving Indecisive Uni Decisions
بِسْمِ ٱللّٰهِ ٱلرَّحْمَٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيم
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Hallo, Lieblings!
How have you been?
Lately, I’ve been busying myself with my university applications – things that actually bother people in the same high school year as I did 2 years ago if you are wondering. But that doesn’t really matter anyway. Back then I was actually didn’t get the hype of all my friends being indecisive of their choices and so-called path of life. Time flies really fast, man. I remembered the first day of Studienkolleg was driving me insane and suddenly this particular indecisive stress floods my mind.
In Germany, we are not limited to choose any university of our liking. Say it 2, 5, or even 20. You can actually apply to as much uni as you want. However I came to realize that the more options you have, the more decision you have to make, thus the more exhausted your brain will be. I don’t know if this is a normal thing to experience or is it me that overthink. I feel like this is a VERY big deal for me as this is the place I’m going to be attached to for the next 3 years. Yes, three. Officially you only need 3 years to get your Bachelor degree -- if possible.
I explored, researched, let that thousands of tabs in the browser tab until indefinite time range, let my laptop in the sleeping mode for several days, asked as many people possible, made connections with people from that particular university, and received good and the not-so-good feedback. All of this experience gave me thrills of excitement and fear at the same time.
I’m scared of going forward, fearing I wouldn’t choose the right path. But the entrance door has been shut closed. There is no way back.
I was actually looking for any enlightenment possible until I came across one particular podcast on TED Talks Daily – a mind shifter talk from an Emergency Room (ER) doctor named dr. Darria Long. She talked about changing mindset from ‘crazy mode’ to ‘ready mode’. My head is crazy noisy right now. Especially at the time being really indecisive.
In a nutshell, dr. Darria talked about the trinity:
- Relentlessly triage,
- Design for crazy,
- Get out of your head.
Let me explain.
1. Relentlessly triage
Meaning to decree challenges based on its urgencies. We all sometimes tend to respond to all of the challenges the same way. Individuals who couldn't differentiate threat and non-threat thus reacting the same way through every challenge has doubled the level of stress hormone. You can't do it all at once and you don't have to, because we triage.
There are some circumstances that force us to throw some work out of the list – things that are beyond our capability, things that we must move on from, even if it’s gut-wrenching. In the Emergency Room (ER) dr. Daria mentioned that the doctors there are being trained to ‘mengikhlaskan’ or let it be. If you wanted to do everything -- even things that aren't worth fighting for anymore -- then you’ll have no energy to dwell with the real majors.
There are some circumstances that force us to throw some work out of the list – things that are beyond our capability, things that we must move on from, even if it’s gut-wrenching. In the Emergency Room (ER) dr. Daria mentioned that the doctors there are being trained to ‘mengikhlaskan’ or let it be. If you wanted to do everything -- even things that aren't worth fighting for anymore -- then you’ll have no energy to dwell with the real majors.
2. Design for crazy
Half of handling the crazy is how you prepared for it. How can we prepare, so that the task will be easier to do? Plan, automate, decrease temptations!
3. Get out of your head
Meaning we have to shove away all of that internal screams and temptations to walk away. FACE IT. This particular part, I don’t actually want to summarize it. As it’s indeed a meaningful story. Here is what I kind of paraphrased while listening to the talk.
One day, a woman came to the ER for labor and I realize that the cord was wrapped around the baby's neck, not once, but twice. I was the only doctor available. I am indeed scared, but I couldn't let it de-rail me. We all get scared and nervous but it is what you do next that matters. That first feeling isn't the problem, it could be an important sign, the problem is when it derail us.
In ‘crazy mode’ our internal monolog started to catastrophize thus making us start to get that tunnel vision. We couldn't finish anything that way. Now, how to get out of our own head then? I tend to actively put the focus on someone else. I see myself in the arena — what do they need? what do they fear? and how can I help?
Research shows that when you prime your brain with what essentially compassion we disrupt that tunnel vision and internal monologue thus broaden your perception so your brain could actually take in more information – making you see more possibilities and make a better decision. Just try it! Know that your internal monolog can derail you. If you get out of your own head, you get on your way.
I didn't focus on what I feared, but on the mother and the baby. On things, they needed me to do. So I got the cord off and the strong cries of a newborn drowned out the sirens and beep in the ER. When I walked out of the room and saw some of my other patients in the ER, I came to realize something. Despite some of their own problems that had brought them to the ER, they've all come together to root for the baby and share the joy.
When you go from crazy mode to ready mode, others notice. They actually want to do it, they just don't know how they just need one example — which could be you.
This made me realize, hey, scary things that have been told as ‘testimonies’ before might be happening to some people. For example in my case, low probabilities of finishing the Bachelor in time, failure in exams, high standardized professors, highly competitive environment, and the list goes on.
But they are them and you are you. It’s kind of unfair for me to judge my self-worth based on other people’s experiences. Like what I did a couple days earlier. I was really scared hearing some people’s stories, but then a good friend of mine, Dila, told me: “Kalo ga ambil cuma karena takut gagal ngga cucok sih kayaknya.” – “If you didn’t take the chance just because you’re afraid of failure... it’s not cool.”
You know that particular time when you know what you need to be doing or thinking about, but need someone to confirm your thoughts? Yeup. Thanks dil, HAHA.
Design for crazy! Rather than giving up your targets and ambitions of reaching your ‘end game’, what can you do now to lower the possibility of failing in the future? Which steps do you need to take if you want your pinnacle to be at a particular height? The output is the game changer I suppose.
Let’s say we all know that Harvard University is one of the best schools in the whole wide world for almost all majors. But, does that apply when you wanted to be a wizard? Well, you need to go to Hogwarts for that, dude. Though you may be the smartest geek in Harvard and probably founded a multi-billon company, does that doesn’t make you be able to reach your dream of becoming a wizard.
Going to Harvard may be tempting. Knowing the prestige, the networking, the smarties of the smarts are there, and the data-based testimonies!! But again we have to triage correctly. Is this what we need to do in order to get our willing output of being a wizard? Again, our targetted ‘end game’ plays a gigantic role in our decision. Let me ask you a question, who do you picture yourself to be in 4 or maybe 5 years from now? Does that decision make you closer, to who you wanted to be?
At some point, we might want to choose a path that has a higher probability of survival rate (at Harvard you won’t have to be struck by lightning bolts during Quidditch, facing evil Death Eaters, or died instantly because someone said Avada Kedavra to you, duh). But even real data-based probability may not apply to everyone, including us.
There is still that X-Factors we may have that others don’t and vice versa. At the end of the day, how we value our worthiness towards any particular decision depends on how well we walked through the fire – how we cope with the challenges. The limit of others might be yours if you looked at it the same way as they did. But let me remind you that you are still capable into turn it into a challenge instead.
It’s in our hands to see fire as a life-threatening being or as the beginning of life.
Brave yourself to try. Face it. Adapt to the odds. Survive.
You know, sometimes it's not you that overthink the probabilities, but it's you that let fear controls your decision. Take the chance, HAJAR RASA TAKUT!
I really hope that you’ll soon receive that ‘aha-moment’ in whatever hardships or indecisive situations you are facing right now. Please, please for my Uni applications too haha, hope it all works out. In the meantime, stay healthy and productive!!
“The thing about growing up with Fred and George," said Ginny thoughtfully, "is that you sort of start thinking anything's possible if you've got enough nerve.” (J.K. Rowling in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince)
Love and light,
Sintya✌
Saturday, May 30, 2020
101 Series: Alur Pendaftaran Studienkolleg (pt. 2)
بِسْمِ ٱللّٰهِ ٱلرَّحْمَٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيم
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Hallo, Lieblings!
How ya doin'?
If you have noticed I may pause talking about Germany stuff for the whole Ramadan, because of one and two things. However now let's continue our unfinished talk last week in my previous 101 Series post, 101 Series: Studienkolleg In General. Today I wanted to share with you guys about one of the most malesin parts to think about when applying, the timeline. I'm the type of person that would be easily overwhelmed by too much information and needed more time to process them.
I would actually like to talk mainly in Bahasa (again) because this is more of Indo-related procedures. I hope you don't mind!
Seperti yang sudah aku bahas di post sebelumnya, ada 2 cara mendaftar ke Studienkolleg, yaitu langsung kirim berkas ke Univesitas yang dituju (direkt) dan lewat Uni Assist. Untuk mempermudah teman-teman memvisualisasikan alur pendaftaran Studienkolleg, kita bahas pakai contoh kasus, ya.
KASUS: Nobita adalah lulusan SMA di Indonesia yang ingin mendaftar jurusan Biologi di Kota Halle (Saale). Ia perlu sertifikat Studienkolleg karena ijazah yang dimiliki tidak diakui oleh pemerintah Jerman, maka Ia pun mendaftar di Studienkolleg (Studkol) jurusan M-Kurs.
- Pertama, Nobita harus mencari informasi di website Studienkolleg Halle.
- Untuk mendaftar Studienkolleg lewat Uni Halle, Nobita harus mengirim berkas lewat Uni Assist. (more info: https://www.studienkolleg.uni-halle.de/51052_1482743/)
- Nobita harus membuat akun di Uni Assist, meng-upload data yang dibutuhkan, dan mengisi formulir data diri. Formulir yang sudah diisi nantinya harus di print dan dikirimkan ke alamat Uni Assist di Jerman. Karena pengiriman Indonesia-Jerman cukup lama, maka waktu pengiriman juga harus dipertimbangkan.
- Setelah semua data dan dokumen diterima oleh Uni Assist, apabila semua oke, Nobita akan mendapatkan surat undangan (Zulassung) untuk mengikuti atau ujian masuk Studienkolleg Halle. (Aufnahmeprüfung/ANP).
- Nobita melampirkan surat undangan ujian (Zulassung) di Studienkolleg Halle untuk mengajukan visa studi di Kedutaan Jerman di Jakarta.
- Setelah 1-2 bulan tergantung antrian, Nobita mendapatkan visanya dan siap berangkat ke Jerman.
- Nobita datang di hari ujian dengan membawa Zulassung. Apabila diterima, Nobita akan belajar selama 1 tahun disana.
Universitas di Jerman umumnya membuka pendaftaran baik untuk program S1 dan Studienkolleg 2 kali dalam setahun, yakni saat Wintersemester dan Sommersemester. Untuk Studienkolleg umumnya Wintersemester dimulai sekitar bulan Oktober awal dan pendaftaran dibuka mulai awal bulan April hingga akhir bulan Mei. Sedangkan untuk Sommersemester dimulai pada pertengahan bulan April dan pendaftarannya dibuka dari awal bulan Desember sampai pertengahan Januari.
Beberapa Studienkolleg bisa jadi memiliki peraturan mereka masing-masing dalam urusan pendaftaran, jadi lebih baik bertanya langsung semisal ada pertanyaan terkait pendaftaran disana. Syukur syukur kalau ada kakak tingkat yang pernah sekolah disana jadi bisa tanya langsung. Grup Facebook Perhimpunan Pelajar Indonesia (PPI) Jerman juga aktif, jadi sering sering aja tanya disana meskipun sekadar untuk sharing.
Sebenarnya menurutku pribadi, segala urusan pendaftaran dan administrasi memang terlihat ribet dan malesin at the first glance, tapi sebenarnya nih kalau dijalanin aja ngga kerasa kok. Soalnya, mau ngga mau harus tetep maju ya kan ya 🙈
Jujur, dulu aku orangnya penakut banget. Takut tanya, takut berpendapat, takut berbicara depan umum, banyak takut takutnya lah bikin gemes sendiri aja haha. Tapi karena disini aku 'dipaksa oleh keadaan' untuk melewati comfort zone yang udah aku buat sendiri... Rasanya emang ngga nyaman, tapi ada random quote di Pinterest tanpa nama once said,
Everything you ever wanted is on the otherside of fear.
Daripada kejar kejaran sama rasa tidak nyaman karena takut itu,
why not beat the monster so it wont haunt you ever again?
I'll end the post here though, mungkin salah satu post ku yang terpendek kali ya? Haha. Terimakasii sudah menyempatkan baca, semoga sehat selalu teman teman. Stay safe at home!😊
Love and light,
Sintya 💖
Friday, May 15, 2020
Inferiority Complex, A Game Changer
بِسْمِ ٱللّٰهِ ٱلرَّحْمَٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيم
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Hello, Lieblings!
How are you doing today?
Despite our current adversity and keeping up adapting with the new normal, I hope you and your loved ones are staying healthy and safe at home. For those who are observing Ramadhan, I hope you are maximizing the last couple of days of Ramadhan. May Allah bless us with unconditional peace and tranquility.
After all this time being forced to stay at home and be left with so much time in your hands – does your mind start to get tangled? So many ideas may be overflowing inside our heads, suddenly our creative sides boost, and at some point, we realize that we got so much potential within us.
But then on the way of looking for some inspirations from other people to execute the ideas, we tend to... you know it. Compare. Too much comparison may actually make us having something psychologists call ‘inferiority complex’. Personally, I consider this as an alien word to me until a couple days ago a dear friend of mine brought this topic up. (Special credit goes to Rifka!💖)
So what does inferiority complex even mean?
According to the Cambridge Dictionary, an inferiority complex means a feeling that you are not as good, as intelligent, as attractive, etc as other people.
Still feel it’s an alien term by now? 👽
I wouldn’t lie, sometimes the roughest, judgemental, and meanest person to myself... is me all along. Every time my mind came up with a kind-of brilliant idea, there is a monkey voice on the back of my mind saying things like,
“Ohahah are you sure you are worthy of doing it?”
“Hmm I think you really lack skills at this matter, you have no chance,”
“Du-uh there are so many talented other people doing it already, your idea is no good at all.”
“Are you reALLY sure you wouldn’t be inconsistent?”
Yeah, monkey voice because 1) It’s annoying, 2) I can hear the monkey voice saying unnecessary trash featuring its high-pitched laugh, feeling good that I am slowly drifting away. Sometimes it gets so noisy here inside. The feeling of wanting to sleep to make the voices inside me stop saying unwanted things is unbearable. 🐵
Then, I remember listening to an audiobook version of Oprah Winfrey’s The Wisdom of Sundays a couple months ago. A book about Oprah’s spiritual journey and her wisdom towards perceiving what she believes about the soul and the spirit. It’s blatantly a shift-turner book that made me want to repeatedly listen to it. Long story short, this book is full of ‘aha moments’. What I find unique about this audiobook is that, rather than to ‘read’ the printed version of the book as a monologue, Oprah made it as a compilation of meaningful conversation with the guests – some, from her Super Soul Sunday show.
If anyone of you thinks this one is a doctrine of any certain religion, the answer is no. Rather than as what people may consider as religious, it’s more 'spiritual'. The idea of the book is getting wisdom from various (AMAZING) people with their inspirational perspectives towards love, life, mindfulness, fighting ego, grace, and gratitude, etc. Beautifully written words from Oprah that actually enrich your mind and soul I’d say.
In one of the chapters, Oprah talks with one of the guests, Michael A. Singer that is well known for his book titled The Untethered Soul. In a nutshell, he talks about this what I called the noisy ‘monkey voice’. There are actually a few lines of his book that are being discussed that I kept in my mental-brain notes until this point – though I sometimes forget. Should better keep it in Google Keep.
“People go through so many changes in the name of ‘trying to find myself’. They want to discover which of these voices, which of these aspects of their personality, is who they really are. The answer is simple: none of them.” (Michael A. Singer)
I was like. Dayumm.
Basically what Mr. Singer writes is that we are not our minds. To be happier, we should be conscious and aware of our role as only the listener, the observer of our mind. Those belittling, toxic thoughts? Dear, believe me, they are not you. Though those thoughts are out there, it’s your choice to listen to it or not.
As thought-provoking as it should be, he continues with a line that I keep close to my heart.
“In order to be who you are, you must let go of who you think you are.” (Michael A. Singer)
When I think of it, sometimes I’m being overly harsh and mean to myself. Covering the real painful words through shades of (toxic) motivation. Though I’m still dwelling with it and oh God, it is sure a hell of a ride. Cause, believe me, words that are spoken are not easy to put into action.
I was flabbergasted with the Instagram stories from an entrepreneur named Uma Hapsari, the founder of Amazara. Here is the paraphrased version of it,
“Ask yourself, are the judgment and fears are worth it to be heard and eventually stop you for reaching your dreams? For voicing the voice that you have, things that you need to say, to help other people who may need your help? If it’s not, maybe it’s time for us to let that aside and to rather focus on what we can actually contribute.”
We tend to blame society for giving irrelevant opinions and demotivating advice though in reality, it’s what we chose to consume all along. After all this time we busy ourselves seeking for who we are and what we believe, without realizing that the stars are actually within us.
(Oop what a very poetic paragraph I should be proud of.)
Hesitating to apply for a scholarship? Hey, trying is never a mistake. Been wanting to write a novel? Write it now! Start a Youtube channel? Podcast? Bullet journalling? No doubt, you'll get a handle of it. Learn to illustrate or to write typographies? I can't understand why haven't you even start yet as I see so much potential hidden in you. 🙇
Hesitating to apply for a scholarship? Hey, trying is never a mistake. Been wanting to write a novel? Write it now! Start a Youtube channel? Podcast? Bullet journalling? No doubt, you'll get a handle of it. Learn to illustrate or to write typographies? I can't understand why haven't you even start yet as I see so much potential hidden in you. 🙇
Now, I want you to name the most beautiful places on Earth you could think about at the moment. You may mention Bora Bora in French Polynesia, Raja Ampat Islands in Indonesia, Zakynthos Island in Greece, Niagara Falls in Canada (yeah as you can see I have an abnormal relationship with anywhere watery). And I’d never lie, those places ARE undoubtedly breathtaking and exhilarating.
But you know what, every time you are feeling not good enough towards yourself, I want you to Google picture those beautiful places and ponder about what God says in the Qur’an Surah At-Tin verse 4 (95:4).
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| source: quran.com |
Of all those seemingly the most beautiful and flawless places on Earth, even God says that we are the best of creations. As a reminder foremost to myself, let’s step by step accept who we actually are with all of the flaws while being more aware of the voices inside our head. In order to heal, we need time and that's normal! We are in this together and I believe, we could get the hang of it. ✌
You are you, and no other. And that is what makes you special.
Need more evidence to prove that you are ‘that’ precious?
I don’t think so.
Here is a little gift just for you to end this rough week, well done! I hope you have a blast today and find this post somewhat beneficial. 😊
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Love and light,
Sintya🌹
Sunday, May 3, 2020
Cavemen of the 21st Century
بِسْمِ ٱللّٰهِ ٱلرَّحْمَٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيم
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Hello, Lieblings!
I hope you guys are doing well throughout this (still) time of uncertainty and for those who are observing the holy month of Ramadan, despite the current situation we are facing, may Allah shower us with peace, calamity, and of course, strength.
How are you guys? No, I mean, really. How are you? What do you feel? Are you feeling warm and joyful? Or are you feeling numb and blue?
In my case, I'm actually feeling hazy and cloudy a few days ago. Not only because the weather is literally cloudy, windy, and gloomy, but I feel like... empty inside. It feels like there is a big hole inside me that is longing and aching for something.
For those who don't know yet, I'm actually taking a gap semester right now as my major begins in Winter Semester which is actually in around September/October. This may also change due to the Coronavirus, but, who knows. Long story short, I miss the time when I was positively busy and productive.
There are also times when I have unintentionally busy myself with things that don't really beneficial for me. I could actually be scrolling through Kekeyi's Instagram account to get some good laugh for a couple hours (and I actually feel bad about it right now? Haha, Astaghfirullah).
Sometimes I even spend way too much time watching cooking Youtube videos, David Chang's Netflix shows or simply stalking recipes in Cookpad and Tasty, without actually cooking them. I'm actually tired of being tired of not doing anything useful. I don't know if that sentence even makes any sense, but I hope you guys can somehow understand.
Then, I came to realize that I feel like I've had enough of being too caught up in a web of useless things. I longed to be productive and actually miss studying, working hard, and actually going to classes offline.
WhoA.
Never in my life have I ever think about saying those things.
I'm in awe myself.
And today, with a handful of motivation and consideration I have piled up since last night, I was planning of going to study to prepare for the upcoming semester. But then I was intrigued to go to Youtube. Procrastination alert. (Procrastinators, gimme your bump fists!! 👊👊)
However, I came across videos of gentle reminders from a Sheikh I currently love to hear, and his name is Omar Suleiman. He founded a platform that I found very useful and made Islamic studies really accessible for people through Yaqeen Insitute and Yaqeen Institue Youtube channel. I don't know, I feel like I could listen to his virtual halaqah for hours. His voice is so soothing and calming, and I think I wouldn't mind if a person like him scolds me. Lol.
I was really intrigued by a video titled Find Clarity in Your Cave. Sheikh Omar spoke about the story of Ashabul Kahf, meaning the 'people of the cave'. These people were actually being mentioned in the Qur'an in Surah Al Kahf (verse 9 -26) and the Biblical version of the people is actually called The Seven Sleepers of Ephesus. Though the Qur'an doesn't really mention the number of them.
The story is about a number of young men who secluded themselves from the 'chaos' of the society at around 250 CE. They, as believers of Tawheed or the oneness of Allah SWT and the teachings of Prophet Isa AS, rebelled against the practices of their current Roman king called Daqyanoos (Decius) and his people. The tyrannical king would annually hold pagan sacrifices dedicated to worship idols, which wasn't aligned with what they held tight into. The king was absolutely really angry with their rebellion, hence wanted them to be killed. The Ashabul Kahf then fled and went into hiding. It reached a certain point when they need to rest for a while in a cave and decided to sleep while leaving their dog Qitmir as a guard at the entrance of the cave. On the contrary to what they feel about sleeping for just a few hours when they wake up, Allah SWT had miraculously made them + Qitmir sleep for 300 solar years (equivalent to 309 lunar years).
Sheikh Omar Suleiman compared this story of our current situation -- The Quarantine. Due to the widespread of the pandemic, we too, need to seclude ourselves from the outside world. When we think about it, aren't we actually the cavemen of the 21st century?
Rather than complaining about things we don't actually have in control, shouldn't we better use this unique opportunity of solitude in our 'cave'? Avoiding the dusty chaos of the worldly life, that we used to face in our normal days? Reflect. Ponder. Count our blessings. Enjoy the silence.
Maybe... God knows that we are too caught up and baffled with our daily errands not noticing the Earth slowly weakens. Maybe, this pandemic is actually a blessing in disguise. When our ego is forced to mute, when kindness and bravery started to grow, nourishing more and more across the globe, when at last human beings looked surprisingly more 'humanly'. People started to spread not only love but also free educative classes (as an act of love, right?) throughout Youtube, Live-Instagrams, and Webinars. I was actually stunned.
Now that we know that being at home itself could be a blessing for those who are having the privilege to, the question now is, how to maximize this one-of-a-lifetime (hopefully) opportunity?
Reflecting at what I did few days ago, I think, some people may feel the same way as I do. Busy myself doing 'unbeneficial' things. Unintentionally. Then miraculously I found that the takeaways from Imam Omar Suleiman in his another virtual halaqah, "Avoiding of which that doesn't concern you", really slaps me on the face.
He referred to the flipside of a hadith reported by Ibn Umar: The Prophet Muhammad PBUH said, "The most beloved people to Allah are those who are most beneficial to people." If that is the case, then the flip side is that the people who are the most abandoned by Allah are those who are the most unbeneficial to people.
Aside from Islam itself and the hadiths that I'm quoting in this post, I think we can actually still learn something. I think this hadith is trying to tell us that, don't. waste. the. frikin. oxygen. by doing stuff that is useless. Everyone is currently facing this kind of trial, I believe. Borderless. Every race, every nation, every language's speaker, every age.
People are having too much time in their hands that they are so easy to get lost. Just by consuming the latest news, you could suddenly be caught up in a drama. Juicy gossips and affairs with people that are exposing other brothers' and sisters' flaws might suddenly fill our Instagram explore page -- which aren't actually our concern, plus, it doesn't really have any benefit.
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Sometimes we are too busy scrolling our virtual timeline not realizing our analog timeline does not stop. Dude, it's mercilessly still freaking ticking. It doesn't care about whether we are facing a pandemic or not, whether we are watching a halaqah from great scholars, Bill Gates' interviews or even Happy Tree Friends on Youtube. I too, am still learning and struggling in this concern. Honestly.
HOWEVER scrolling through the timeline had made brave stories of heroes without capes during the pandemic also accessible. I could never imagine being put in the shoes of people that are in deep sorrow and confusion of how they could actually bury their loved ones that couldn't fight the virus back, and people that are still fighting the odds outside to fulfill their obligations of serving some food on the dinner table. 😔
Though I'm none of those brave heroes and 'front liners' during this pandemic, maybe I could try not to waste the holy grail privilege to just breathe normally at home. Without any pain. Without suffering. Without the help of any machines and ventilators. Now, don't you feel privileged enough?
Sometimes it's not social media. It's not the news. It's neither Netflix nor Youtube. It's not about other people that intrigued us. It's about ourselves and how we make use of all things that are being served before our eyes. Considering everything has two sides of a story, it's up to us whether to make it a positive thing or a bad one.
Maybe, this is the time to actually reflect and think not only of the mishaps we have done before but how we could go out a better person at the end of this pandemic. It could be a better daughter, sister, student, writer, reader, learner. Be a better someone. Seeking for what actually meant for us and busy ourselves with things that are actually worthy of our time and being. Though I'm a lazy slacker myself sometimes, I don't want to die in vain being no one and leaving no useful legacy.
Trying is the keyword here folks and starting small is a great start. Forcing ourselves to do enormous things that we can't handle (though they are good) may overwhelm us, hence lose the perfect momentum.
May the seeds of kindness and love that are being planted today still nourish until an undefined time and the remembrance of the bravery of our people always have a place in our hearts. In the meantime, let's work hard and together become a wiser 'time-waster' in our caves! Are you with me? 💪
"The world is three days: As for yesterday, it has vanished. As for tomorrow, you may never see it. As for today, it is yours, so work on it." (Hasan al Basri)
Sintya✌
References:
https://www.britannica.com/topic/Seven-Sleepers-of-Ephesus
https://www.islamiclandmarks.com/jordan/cave-of-ashabe-kahf-exterior
Tuesday, April 28, 2020
How Sariawan Changes Life
بِسْمِ ٱللّٰهِ ٱلرَّحْمَٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيم
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Hallo, Lieblings!
Let's start this post by congratulating my fellow Muslims who are celebrating Ramadan! May Allah SWT filled our hearts with a bundle of joy and harmony, shower us with loads of peace and prosperity, and grant us relief in this time of uncertainty during this blessed month. 💖
Let's start with the fact that something peculiar happened to me a week before Ramadan started.
I hope you are not clickbait-ed with what I wrote as the title of this post because dude, it really happened. For those who aren't used to the word 'sariawan', it literally means ulcer. You know, that teeny-tiny wound inside your mouth. Oftentimes develop when you accidentally bite your tongue, when you lack essential vitamins, or even when you are simply stressed out and lacking sleep.
Judging by its size, this teeny tiny little wound is really small... but don't get me started talking about the pain. Man, it is painful. Very. Especially when it caught inflammation and turned white. I wonder what is even more painful, being heartbroken or getting 3 ulcers all at once. But when you think about the consequences of both wound types they do actually have similar consequences; uncomfortable experience when you are eating (and lack of appetite), drinking and even talking. They just... hurt differently. 😀
(Ok, that one's so cringy, I laughed)
Quick info for those who might feel alienated hearing the word 'Ramadan', here's a brief explanation to y'all.
Ramadan is the 9th month of the Islamic lunar calendar when Muslims all around the world observe it as a month of fasting, reflection, and prayer. It commemorates the first revelation of the Prophet Muhammad SAW (a.k.a. The Qur'an). Ramadan lasts for 29 to 30 days depending on the year and the holiday of Eid al Fitr marks the end of the month. During the whole month of Ramadan, Muslims (that are capable of practicing) are obliged to fast on a daily basis from sunrise to sunset. Sawm, The Arabic word for fasting means “to refrain” not only from food, drink, but also nasty actions, thoughts, and words.
So, I hope you guys had a little bit of an idea that as a Muslim I'm not allowed to even take a bite of a cookie and even drink a sip of dalgona coffee during the day in Ramadan. That's why folks I was actually planning to eat so many desserts as possible and enjoy the last minute blessing of my homemade brownies to pile up fat under my skin before Ramadan so that I wouldn't die in hunger.
DISCLAIMER: Pardon the exaggeration haha. And no, you wouldn't die by intermittent fasting! In contrary to what people may think, fasting is actually good for our health. (read more: Live Science | Health Benefits of Fasting, Backed by Science | Evidence-Based Health Benefits of Intermittent Fasting)
Now going back to the ulcer thing. As you could easily guess, I got an ulcer. A big and white one. On the upper right side of my lip. When I closed my mouth, this little nasty thing hits the literal checkpoint. My canine tooth or the fang (re: gigi taring). Of all the areas in my mouth, I often question it for choosing this certain spot.
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That is the least pain I want to feel in this world, really.
And a week before Ramadan? Really, ulcer?
I was devastated, I couldn't even eat my favorite spaghetti carbonara peacefully or even drink my beloved homemade boba 😭
But in every oddity, there is always marvel and things get a little bit more interesting from here. As I couldn't really open my mouth all the time (how do you expect me to?!), to avoid the 'curse of the fang' I have no other option than closing it. But flexing the muscle at the side of my right mouth upward, and you know it.
I curved a smile.
Yes, you got it right, folks. I was forced by this nasty thing to smile for literally 24/7. Before this incident, I wasn't actually the full-of-smile type of a person. I'd rather say my frown is like my crown, it's there all along (yes you heard it HAHA). I couldn't recall the time when my sister ever compliments me for smiling as I was really a grumpy ball back home.
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I mean, why should I smile even when nobody's watching. People will think I'm mad or might even think that my head hit the wall or something. It sounds cringy and kind of an exaggeration, however, this ulcer is actually one of the turning points in my life. How?
I read articles about the benefits of smiling (and I think you ever did too, even only once) but never really benefit from it because I don't really like to smile. Except for photos. And if I'm really happy. And faking smiles, oooops. In a nutshell, I wasn't actually used to smile on a daily basis without any reason. 🙅
But. This. Nasty. Ulcer. Changed. Everything!!!
However, as days go by, I kind of realize something. Every time I looked at myself in the mirror every morning, a reflection of the pretty-smiling me stared back. Though I wasn't certainly happy with anything, smiling brightens my mood and starts the day more energized. Every time I'm trying to solve some ridiculously hard Sudoku game -- while smiling ofc -- makes me feel a little lighter. Even when I'm about to sleep, I smile, and those nights may be the nights when my head actually feels relaxed.
I think that week was the happiest week of my life not because I won a BTS concert tickets giveaway and rode the Ferrari, but simply because I smiled a lot. And maybe, you don't even need those things to be happy and make others happy 😊 Days after the whole ulcer thing had actually affected my life in many ways. I even still smiling more on a daily basis up until today. This grumpy ball is turning into a sunbeam!
I was actually asking a friend of mine, Hasna, how to get rid of my chubby chin. And God had bizarre ways of actually giving me solutions plus the bonuses. My mind was actually blown up even more after I experienced such dramatic tragedy -- which turns out to be a blessing in disguise -- and re-reading the benefit of smiling.
#1 Smile combats depression
Researchers have found that preventing people from frowning and having them demonstrate happy feelings can actually lessen symptoms of depression.#2 Grin and Bear it!
This expression actually means to smile even though you are not happy. Researchers found that when people's faces were manipulated into smiles, they actually showed impressive movements in their moods and well-being, such as lower rates of stress. 😉#3 Reduce blood pressure
Smiling helps you to relax, consequently, your blood pressure will naturally decrease. Even just five minutes of smiling off and on while thinking of a pleasant memory can eliminate stress and help your blood pressure drop. When recovering from a stressful situation, study participants who were smiling had lower heart rates than those with a neutral facial expression.#4 Smiling strengthens you immune system
One study found that hospitalized children who were visited by story-tellers and puppeteers that had made them smile and laugh had higher white blood cell counts than those children who weren't visited. It also revives your body's energy levels! 💪#5 Smiling releases Endorphins
Endorphins are natural mood-boosters chemicals that could help you manage stress and anxiety. They are essentially a sugar rush for your brain, but without any terrifying after-effects like grumpiness and lethargy. Surprisingly, smiling can trigger the release of this hormone equivalent to when you're working out, resulting in what is known as a runner's high. Plus, Endorphins act as natural painkillers, so if you're experiencing any discomfort, a quick smile can help you relax and feel better.#6 Smiling makes you look younger
Studies have shown that on average when you smile, you can actually look about 3 years younger. Smiling can naturally lift your face and can fend off any frown lines you may get.
Well, well, well. To be honest, I don't know whether to believe in every single point, but I think no harm is actually being made if you smile more. Except for certain circumstances, like when the boss is in full anger, or when you are being scolded by your parents, or even when your friend is telling you a teary story. You would actually risk a higher level of stress. Please, just, don't smile 😂
After all, I'm a survivor of this unidentified blessing, covering up as a tragedy. And please, though smile releases Endorphins and increases immunity and bla bla bla, you still have to move that ass and keep moving! Sweat it out!
In this time of uncertainty, I understand that we are too, forced to adapt to the new normal and might feel exhausted from doing the same routine, in the same place all over again. Especially for my fellow Muslims. But when you are tired, remember just by smiling you are already donating good deeds into your bank account of The Hereafter. Narrated by At-Tirmidhi, Abdullaah ibn Haarith said, "I never came across a person as much as Prophet Muhammad PBUH. He PBUH regarded smiling to a brother as an act of charity."
I really hope that you guys could actually take some takeaways and wished that this weird experience of mine could benefit you in many unique ways possible. Now, take a moment to smile! Take a moment to reminisce how delicious the food your mother made for iftar or even at your father's lame jokes. Let's spread this contagious act of positivity rather than mourning over things we couldn't control.
Cheers on the great jobs and accomplishments you have done during the quarantine up until today! Might not be the most productive phase of life, but great job, for the odds you've already fought. We are human anyway, flaws and imperfections are always part of our game. Oh and in case anyone hasn't told you today, I love your smile. It suits you. 😊
And lastly, whO doesn't lOve alpaca in sunglasses? lol.
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Love and light,
Sintya💖
"So whoever does an atom's weight of good will see it, and whoever does an atom's weight of evil will see it." [Qur'an Surah Az-Zalzalah verse 7-8]
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